Just Dance
by Puzzlie's Imajinacion
Summary: Puzzleshipping/Blindshipping same thing/same difference . Post-canon, so spoilers. Basically Yuugi alone with his thoughts about his other self. Angsty. Oneshot.


**Author's Note: **My first try at a YGO fanfic. Sorry for those of you who watch me for the other fanfics I generally do, but I'm back into YGO now, and I really, really love YGO. I wrote this in about an hour so it might not be very good, but hey, it's my first real try (I have another one that probably will never see the light of day outside my laptop because of how bad and old it is [wrote it back in like 2004 or something]). I just hope you guys will like it. I like what I did with it, but I'm not necessarily sure if I'm happy with how it came out. I'm also kind of deprived on sleep right now, though, so I'm not sure if I'll like it as much when I wake up. We'll see what happens.

**_Warnings:_** This occurs post-canon, so spoilers. Angst.

_**Pairings:**_ Puzzleshipping. Um, basically.

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Yuugiou because if I did the ending would have obviously have been different, and I wouldn't be having a need to write this.

**ALSO **renamed after Lady Gaga's Just Dance because of some of the lines in the song and how it reminded me of my fic. Also, Magenta Flamingo and I by some miracle were both listening to this song on Winamp at the same time (we don't live near each other, and we were talking online, it was weird but so totally awesome) and so we saw it as a sign. HURRAY.

Enjoy?

**_Just Dance  
_**

_I keep grabbing for it and it's not there. I keep grabbing for the familiar shape, the familiar weight – grabbing for it, grasping it, but it isn't there. It isn't there. I have to keep reminding myself it isn't there. But I keep wanting to grab it, wanting to hold it (hug it), clench my fingers around the shape in comfort, but it's not there. It's not there. I have to keep telling myself it's not there, and it never will be again. I don't even have the chain that holds it anymore. I don't know what happened to it._

_The puzzle isn't missing. It's gone._

_He's gone._

_I don't even have a memento to remember him by – all I have are these cards! These stupid, stupid cards!_

Grabbing the deck – his deck, _their_ deck, he throws it across his room, tears erupting from his face in the process.

_I promised myself I wouldn't do this. I promised I wouldn't cry again. For him. My hero, my other self._

_He's not here. He'll never be here again._

_He's gone._

Yuugi glances back at the cards scattered all around the floor of his room, and he tries, he tries his best not to cry, but the efforts can only muffle it as a garbled yell through clenched teeth as he grasps his chest and falls to his knees. His hands inch towards some of the cards as he picks them up. He doesn't look at them, he can't view the cards faced up. He wants to, but he doesn't – he can, but he can't – no, he won't. _I'll see my heart, his heart – _our_ heart._ His hands start shaking. Afraid he'll crumple the cards with his unstable mannerisms, he throws them again while letting out another muffled scream. He bites his lips, half hoping they'll bleed but also pleading they won't. _What is that I want? What is it that _you'd_ want? I can't do this without you!_

"Get these cards away from me!" The heated words escaped his lips before he could think. He started to cry again – no, not cry. That would be too soft of an explanation. Sobbing wouldn't have the right description either. It was like his soul was tearing into two. He reaches for the cards he threw once more, tries to gather them up – "It'll be okay! It'll be okay! It always ends up okay. I-I just have a few break downs here and there, but I'll be okay, I'll be okay. It's fine. I'm fine. I'll be fine. I just… it's just another one of the bad days, but I'll be fine tomorrow… I'll see Jounouch-kun and Anzu and Honda-kun and Bakura-kun and-and I'll smile and be my normal self. I can't let them know – they shouldn't know. They don't have to know. I'm strong enough to take care of myself. I have the courage to take care… of this… all by myself… I'm confident… I'm confident all by myself. It'll be okay. It'll be okay. I'll be fine. I'm fine. I'm fine because I'm confident. Right… right?"

No answer back. More tears.

"… C-c-confident…?"

"_When it comes to __**real **__confidence, my aibou is ten times better than you!"_

All the cards he had gathered escaped his fingers, falling down in what to him felt like slow motion as another cry, a particular loud one, exploded from his throat. His hands clenched his face, gripping onto it as the tears cascaded down his face like waterfalls. He escaped into a fetal position to quiet his crying. He resisted the urge dig his nails into his skin.

_It isn't supposed to be like this. It's not supposed to be like this! What happened? Why did this have to happen? We were supposed to be together forever. You said you wanted to be with me forever. I wanted to be with you forever. Zutto… zutto!_

_I can't do this without you._

_But you wouldn't want to see me like this… would you?_

He lifted himself up, feeling slightly weak for reasons he just couldn't understand in words but understood through his heart and soul. He glanced back at his cards, some of them face up. Certain images stabbed him and a hand instinctively grabbed around his waist. _It's not there – it'll never be there again._ He sniffed. _Don't cry. Just don't cry. He wouldn't want to see you cry… You wouldn't want to see me cry._ His hands, shaking once again, reached out and collected a few of the cards carefully off the ground.

Black Magician. _Mahaado._ Black Magician Girl. _Mana_. Bitter smiles slowly spread on his face. The memories are painful, he tells himself, but he remembers them, at least. _You forgot all your memories. I shouldn't complain just because it hurts. At least I remember._

… Kuriboh.

"_This is my trump card!"_

_It was considered the weakest card in the whole Duel Monsters universe… And yet we always used – _he_ always used it… The weakest card, with its big eyes and low level attack points… yet he used it so many times… and it saved him so many times._

"Why does this make me saddest of all…?"

No tears this time, though. His heart just began to feel empty. He held the card to his chest, not exactly understanding his purpose for doing so, before letting it go, letting it fall to the floor, where the rest of them were lay as well.

_I don't think I can ever play this game again. Mou hitori no boku…_ we_ built this deck together. We both put our souls – our hearts – into making it. I just… I wouldn't have the heart to play these cards. Something would just feel like… it was missing…_

_I still talk to you as though you're here…_

_And I'm still waiting to hear your voice reply. But…_

_You're gone._

His head bent low, his eyes half-lidded, as if he just didn't have any energy left. They say it takes more muscle to frown than to smile… but he felt that no matter the weight of any barbell, he'd be able to lift it a lot sooner than he would be able to bring his lips to curve upward.

Without looking at them, he gathered up all the cards one last time, before placing them into a dark drawer and tightly shutting it. _Will I ever be able to look at our heart again…?_

Yuugi sat down on his desk, feeling weightless. There is no item dangling from his neck. Was that why he felt lighter? Or was it… his soul that was making him feel lighter than air? But he also felt heavy… like a weight was pressing down on his shoulders, and he just couldn't shrug it off. He folded his arms on his desk top, bit his lip in slight concentration. _Just think slowly… c'mon, just gotta collect my thoughts… think slowly, and… –_

_You're gone._

_Mou hitori no boku – no… Atemu._ _You're the one who said yourself… you aren't the other me… because… because there's only one Yuugi, right? There's only one me? You are not mou hitori no boku… you're Atemu. I'm Yuugi. That's reality…_

_But if… if there is only one Yuugi – only one me – why do I feel so… why do I feel so empty, so weightless? _Lighter than air, yet with so much weight on his shoulders…

_No. No, no. I'm incomplete. Don't you understand? I'm incomplete with you!_

Tears again. So many tears. _Oh God, I don't want to cry anymore!_

_I wanted to be with you forever… Zutto…_

_He's gone._

_You're gone!_

"YOU'RE GONE!"

More cries escaped him as he buried his head into his arms, praying that no one would hear him. _I don't want anyone to worry about me anymore… I'll be fine. I'll be fine._

_But not without you…_

_It doesn't matter. I don't care. Maybe there isn't two Yuugis – I… I can live with that. You're Atemu, not mou hitori no Yuugi… I can understand that. But… but…_

_Zutto. You will always be… mou hitori no boku._

_-_PI

**P.S.** Mou hitori no boku means "the other me," zutto is a very strong Japanese word for "forever" or "always," and aibou is a very strong Japanese word for "partner." Um... I think that was all I used. Again, remember, sleep-deprived. Well, I hope you liked it. I tried my best to keep canon in there while still trying to use a bit of how I felt about the ending in it as well. I hope I pulled it off. I used elements from both the manga and the anime, depending on what I remembered with both of them. I used a couple of references word for word (at least with the translations I had) and then others were just what I could try to remember. I hope I did well. ^^; Thank you for reading! :)


End file.
